nightmare

Exhalation

Inhalation

If only you’ve seen

what I’ve seen

when i close

my eyes

the swipes of nightmares

of red streaks soaking

down the wall

and seeping

into the mirror

that i stand before

i look across the dark slate

and see my reflection

staring back

with a bruised soul

and realize

the potential

to fail

and feel the pain

and welcome the pain

unwell

cold metal tastes like tinted ice/ eroding between my gnashed teeth/ i bleed the metallic scent of it/ the sharp edge of the past week

it hits me like the damp cold/ as the wind whips my face/ i turn red and raw/ and wish this drink were laced

i scream in the steaming shower/ and drown in the pouring water/ i turn it to cold just to shiver/ and have a reason to want slaughter

i slaughter my dreams of roses/ and crush them with a deeper red/ i rip out my veins with my nails/ all in the dark of my bed