Growth

my vision is blackening/ my head is floating in the air/ waiting to be sunk down/ nobody is here to care

catch me as i’m falling/ i ask, scream, shout/ the only response is the wind/ i crash no doubt

I wrote this at a time when I hurt so much but couldn’t let you know because you were to blame. You were hurting me to the point of me screaming in the shower and pulling out my hair. Since ceasing all communication, I’ve begun to sing in the shower and love myself more than you ever could. You taught me about judgment through your faulty actions, so I took that and learned to stop judging so harshly. I’ve grown so much more without you, and I thank god for that. If all I need is to burn what’s left of you, then so be it because I deserve to be able to. I’ve learned to love so much more deeply and live without doubting myself since I’ve stopped talking to you. I’ve finally stopped screaming and crying and pulling. I’ve finally been truly happy.